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Post by Giovanni Trapani on Aug 11, 2020 8:47:43 GMT -4
Giovanni was in his office, he was engrossed in some paperwork while drinking wine. Not a good combination really. He would read, write and then drink. Rinse and repeat. He refilled his glass quite a few times and the wine bottle was nearly empty. He wanted to do something. Well, he was doing something. Working. But no thats not it. He wanted to find something to ease the bad feeling. He used to smoke. Well, he still does. But he decided to cut that off completely when with Nimue. But he needed to replace that stimulant with something else. He drank wine. So he started to drink. But he nearly drank an entire bottle of the red wine and he still didnt feel happier. All he did was feel drunk. He wasnt a 100% drunk. Surprisingly it was only about 30%. So he wasnt hammered, more like more... honest. Its like a dose thats a perfect truth serum. Or a good one at least
So why did he want to replace smoking and find something pronto? Because yesterday. That rescue... it hurt him. Yea physically, but..., he soon put a hand to his stomach,.... he didnt feel that hurt. Not much since Nimue patched him up. Its more like the emotional one. There was emotional hurt. But, he didnt get to talk about it yesterday. Well, not much. He tried to joke at it how he is stuck as a housewife. But still.... he just felt shitty. How can he describe that feeling. He felt wrong. Everything felt wrong. It felt like Antonio was right, it felt like his family was right. He couldnt do anything. He was a pencil pusher.
This was not just the rescue, it was bigger than that. He just felt pathetic. Not like a man. He felt like an ant that can be stepped on. He couldnt support Nimue any how. Thats what hurt him. He couldnt rescue her because he is slow, weak and inadequate. He cant assist in hero work, because he is a villain and not a fighter. He cant help her vent because its confidential. Hell, he doesnt even care if its hero intel. He just wanted to contribute somehow to her. And he felt he couldnt.
She was blessed with a wonderful quirk that helps not only herself, but the people. He cant help anyone. His Quirk depended on smoking. Hell, even with all the small things, he felt inadequate. His brother was a better artist, better criminal, more loved and more intelligent. He wasnt. He always fell behind him. He fell always behind everyone
Yes, he spoke a little bit about Nimue. But he didnt want to worry her. He just felt guilty for trying to push some information out of her. What kind of a criminal feels guilty. He was pathetic. He couldnt do anything right
And thats when the first drop happened and then the other one and then another and another. He started to cry.
Why was he so bad. He was terrible. What was he doing with his life. What was right and what was wrong. He was convinced he was a bad boyfriend. He built a relationship over lies. He was a villain who wanted to use her for his selfish needs. But he couldnt do that, he didnt have the heart to do that. But he killed her ex. Her ex, Giovanni was sure that the only reason he lucked out with a beauty like Nimue was because she had a shitty boyfriend before. If she had a real man. A decent one, Giovanni wouldnt stand a chance to be with her. He was the type of man that even birds mocked.
He felt that he didnt deserve Nimue. But he was too pathetic to let her go. Why was he so pathetic? Why?
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Post by Nimue Nakahara on Aug 11, 2020 8:55:05 GMT -4
Yesterday she returned from her three days of recovery in the hospital. Getting enough food, water and exercise to make sure her legs were fine and she was gaining weight again from her horrible week of barely getting anything. She would be allowed to go home if someone was there to keep an eye on her and make sure she was doing okay while still recovering, which meant that she had to stay with Giovanni, which was definitely not a bad thing to do. Yesterday... well it had its ups and downs and she wondered if it came because of her own mood, how she was handling things badly and how she was tired and how she had been alone. She did not want this, she did not want anything to continue like it had been before, but there was nothing to change.
Technically she had nothing to do right now. Miu was doing her biology classes and that meant she did not know what to prepare for her own class, or what to do in general about everything. What to say, how to work with it, she had made some drawings but now she sat on the couch, mindlessly watching the television. Actually she was daydreaming and had no idea what they said on the television, she was bored but had promised herself not to bother Giovanni who was working from home to be around her. Yesterday he had said he could take whatever day off that he wanted but he had been awfully long in there that she felt like he had maybe meant something different than what she expected. She wondered if she should bring him some food or drinks, that might not be something bad right? She just left the television on, dropped the remote on the coffee table and made her way slowly into the kitchen. Trying to find where she left the cookies that she baked this morning and get some tea, that would work wonders for anyone, or so she believed.
She found a tray and put a mug of tea on it and a little saucer with cookies and confident that it was alright she just went into the hallway to his study, knocked with her elbow a little (it didn't go that smoothly so it was a soft sound) before opening the door and just showing up. "Tadaa I brought you-" But she felt quiet as she noticed he was crying. She was so close to just dropping the tray but she managed to slide it on the cupboard next to her and hurried to his side. "Are you okay? Are you hurt? Giovanni?" She wasn't sure what to say, surely the quick change of pace, side step hurt her legs but she did not feel it, she did not know what to say, she had not noticed before that anything was wrong apart from their little fight, but that had gone fine in the end right? She hunched down next to his chair to look up at him, would he talk to her?
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Post by Giovanni Trapani on Aug 11, 2020 9:03:18 GMT -4
He was sad and he was crying. He was so useless. He was bad. And sometimes bad at being bad. He is terrible in every way shape or form. So pathetic. And then suddenly Nimue came over to him while he cried. She asked him if he was hurt. He shook his head, he wasnt physically hurt. But was he ok? No
"I'm an ass! Im useless! Im stupid! What good am I at all? Im just bad. So bad. Im bad at being bad. Im an untalented hack! How did I get someone like you is beyond me!" he said as he cried
He did eventually manage to just fling himself at her to hug her and hold her and cry into her. He was sad. Even yesterdays event upset him. Sure it was a minor argument that was resolved, but he never wanted to hurt or upset her or make her angry. He wanted to be a good boyfriend and at that moment he felt he had failed.
Like what good was he? Of what use? He felt as if he was just a shoulder to cry on. How can he be constructive and help her? He cant. He really was a housewife that stayed at home. Hell he even had an apron in the kitchen. And he was helpless compared to Nimue. While he can fight. In Nimues eyes he was helpless as a civillian. She doesnt know he has weapons or that he can use his quirk to get rid of people. But in a way he was. Legally at least. He just wished he can inspire confidence in her eyes. He was weak to her. Thats how he saw it. He wants to do something for her. But what? He just felt so bad. She deserves so much and he offers so little and thats heartbreaking
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Post by Nimue Nakahara on Aug 11, 2020 9:04:23 GMT -4
Standing there, no idea what to do, almost changing her eyes to green to make sure he wasn't hurt at all, but she managed, she managed to stop herself from making this a quirk thing. She brushed through his hair and had this genuine sense of worry on her face. What could she do, oh god, why was he crying? She wanted to say something but he surprised her with asking how he could possibly get someone like her and she held her breath for a second and let him pull her close so he could bury his face against her chest, hold on to her middle and she would hold on to him, brush through his hair, hum softly to calm him down.
First, she let him cry, making sure that he was heard and that he could cry til his heart content. When he calmed down a little, the biggest tears gone, she kissed his head. "Darling?" She said softly, waiting for a sign to know that he was listening, "What's going on?" She hushed still, hummed a little and kept brushing through his hair. She wasn't sure what he said, maybe it was just like spitting out words and confused at what he wanted to say and she did not take it all too serious at what he said, "No-no darling, you are not all that. You are handsome, you are caring and kind, you are the best Italian restaurant owner in town, you are a very great chef and I heard you sing which was music to my ears." She tried to think and tie it to things he did to her. "I don't know my dear, but I think you are rather talented and important, especially to me. I wouldn't want to trade you for anyone else in the entire world." She hummed on when she was done, brushing his hair, holding him against her and just hoping she would give every vibe of a loving girlfriend off to him. What hurt him like this? What was going on? She did not dare to ask, but she would listen, oh how it pained her to see him like this. Was it yesterday? Was he afraid she found him really a good for nothing, a housewife? That wasn't what she wanted him to think and she loved him so dearly that she hoped she could express that.
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Post by Giovanni Trapani on Aug 11, 2020 9:19:29 GMT -4
"Darling?" he lifted his head and she would see his puppy dog eyes. She asked him what was wrong. Giovanni stuttered and barely talked "I didnt want to upset you yesterday... I ruined our dinner. And I just feel so stupid and useless compared to you. Stupid stupid!" he said and hit his head. He was just frustrated and sick of running from the truth. He was bad, slow and stupid
Nimue spoke in a mothery voice saying he isnt that at all. He is handsome and caring and kid and best italian owner in the town. And a great chef and sing and music. He looked away, still teary eyed "I'm not all that great. Compared to others I am trash. If you knew what real men were like"
He was the bottom tier of the family. He was touched she said that. Maybe he was kind and caring. Maybe there was a grain of truth to that which would explain why he was a bad villain. But being the best chef, he doubted.
But the other thing she said, made him look at her
"I-Im important? Y-you wouldnt?" he was shocked and surprised. Maybe in disbelief as well. Soon, he hugged her and listened to her hum. He was silently weeping still. But because her humming and her caring love was touching. Her words were touching. She was like an angel he didnt deserve and didnt dare to let go. He was too clingy. He just rested in her embrace. He hugged her and rested his head on her chest as he silently cried and listened to her beautiful humming.
He wants to be useful to her. It just felt bad for him not to do anything. He was so grateful she loves a sad sap like him. But he should give something in return
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Post by Nimue Nakahara on Aug 11, 2020 9:44:55 GMT -4
Oh, oh no. She felt guilty about her attitude yesterday but she had... no, they had a misunderstanding. And they would do fine and she held him and stopped him from hitting himself and lowered through her knees so they could be face to face while he sat. "Giovanni?" She asked him softly, trying to make him look her in the eye, "You did not ruin dinner, you can't do that, because I love you. I care about you and we just had a misunderstanding of what we both expected from each other and both our fears from each other right?" He cared that she was rescued, not having the contacts she did or maybe the trust, he decided to do so himself, and she had the fear something would happen to him because of that attitude.
She would stand up straight again, pull him against her and just hug him and brush through his hair while humming. Talking to him with a calm and caring matter. She wanted him to feel loved and yet to be able to tell his concerns. "I think I know real man, but what's the definition." She tried to explain that a real man could be different for everyone when it came to opinions. She would not want to lose him, not ever, she felt save and loved and that has not happened in a long time and that's why... HE was the man for her and she was sure she would not want something else. "Yes, I would never trade you for anyone else. I like you for you, you are not trash, you are the ideal man I want. And of course we all compare ourselves to others, but you shouldn't darling, not if it hurts you. I don't want you to feel bad, I want you to see what I see? I know being positive all the time is quite tiring but I don't see anything bad in your life. You have a great restaurant, hard working members there and you have a nice house, nice cars, nice dogs and you have this amazing girlfriend." She teased, she did not think herself that way but she tried to take the load off the heavy messages he got himself. "I think you are rather lucky and that there are thousands of people in the world that wish they were you." also not really good but there were sure people that wish to own a restaurant, own a big house or so many cars and have his money so eh it wasn't a lie.
She would fall silent, continue her hum and would just hold on to him with both her hands, brushing his hair away and just being there for him. "I love you." She finally said after a bit of silence, it could make it or break it, but she wanted to have said it. She wanted him to know that she would stay here and be there for him. He rescued her, he kept her from insanity and loneliness back at the hospital and now she was here, she couldn't be happier.
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Post by Giovanni Trapani on Aug 11, 2020 11:18:11 GMT -4
He looked at Nimue with his teary eyes as she softly called for his name. She spoke how he did not ruin dinner. He listened to her say all those kind words. He nodded at her words. He didnt say anything.
She then stood up straight and pulled him against her. He hugged her. He really did love her calm and caring and motherly voice. She was so good. Too good to be true.
Nimue spoke once again. He quietly listened. Giovanni was in disbelief when Nimue said that she wouldnt trade him for anyone else. She confirmed that. She likes him the way he is. Saying he wasnt trash, but somehow he is the ideal man to her. She said its natural we people compare ourselves to eachother. But if it hurts him, he shouldnt. He bit his lip. He tried not to. But he couldnt wash his hands from his blood. He listened to Nimue more as she continued her speech of pure positive words. He didnt say anything because well, he was listening to her and he was at a loss for words.
He looked away when she mentioned the restaurant. But his gaze did return to her when she said he has a nice house, cars, dogs and last but not least, the amazing girlfriend. The last part did make him smile a bit
She also added that people wish they were him.
"You think that?" he managed to softly ask.
He was still at a loss for words, but at least she progressed and made sure he didnt cry. She even managed to get him to crack a smile. Even if it was a faint one. Giovanni rubbed his eyes in attempt to wipe away the tears. Soon he held his head in pain. He really was crying a lot... and drinking
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Post by Nimue Nakahara on Aug 12, 2020 7:17:36 GMT -4
She hated to see him like this. How he doubted himself, how he hurt himself over things she did no longer consider. Yes, they had a fight yesterday, a fight full of pain and misunderstandings and she had walked away when he started smoking. But he got why she was scared and unhappy and she did not want to make anything worse but hold on to him and just love him. She told him, every single word she could find to explain that it wasn't the case, saying his name to point out that she was serious before holding him in her arms and just make sure he knew she loved him. Brushing his hair, humming and just kissing the top of his head as that was the best she could do while having her hands around him. She wished she could take the pain away, it must have been much deeper, much about everything she did not yet know about him.
She was glad to say that she could make him smile a little and climbed now on his lap at the chair, hoping it would hold the two of them. She bumped her nose softly against his when he asked for certain if she thought people were jealous of him. In a sense she did not mean it in that way exactly but that he had things that a lot of people did not have. "Yea, I am sure." and as they sat like that, he watched him rub his head, wipe away the tears and he looked like he was in pain. "You have a headache?" Could she heal him or shall she offer a normal painkiller? She would normally do the latter but for now she would not mind changing it completely, just for once, right? No harm in it?
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Post by Giovanni Trapani on Aug 12, 2020 11:05:13 GMT -4
While she did put that behind, he still felt the need to apologize to her. Like probing for information even if he knew it was confidental. Like it made no sense!!! He was a villain, he NEEDED to dig for that dirt thats confidental! But strangely he also regretted asking... was regret the right word? He just felt sorry for probing her. Its like there was this internal struggle within him. To be villain or no.
It felt like his villain side berated his civillian side for being soft. But it also felt like his civillian side berated his villain side for pushing his loved one in an unfomtarble position. And in the end all that created was this depressed amalgam of mess. Giovanni wished he can express himself to Nimue, but he cant form words to express himself. Not to mention, Nimue's kind words left Giovanni at a loss of words. He just quietly held her and hugged her.
She eventually made him smile a bit and wipe his tears. Nimue climbed in his lap and he held her. The two booped their noses and touched eachothers nose. Nimue answered one of his questions that he asked. But once he calmed down, he held his head in pain. It was a mix of too much crying to hitting himself to hangover from drinking too much. She then saw that and asked if he had a headache. Giovanni just nodded, he didnt verbally naswer that. He opened his eyes to look at her. He didnt know what to do. He didnt have a painkiller in his office and he didnt feel stable to move. Not to mention he couldnt. He just hugged Nimue and hid his face in her chest and pressed it there. He just did irrational things just to make the pain go away
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Post by Nimue Nakahara on Aug 12, 2020 13:13:16 GMT -4
She made promises before that she would use her quirk only when necessary and surely battling a headache could be done with an aspirin and maybe it would even tackle his feeling of being useless if she would do it. But she wanted him to feel well and not have to worry about this headache while he felt so miserable. She let her eyes lower so he wouldn't see her green eyes as she would touch his temples softly to let Nkosi do the work of finding why he had pain and clearing it up. When done or when it was no longer necessary to rub his temples her eyes turned back to her own colour and she looked up at him in a loving and kind gesture. "Want me to make you a pie or something else I can do to help you? You should stop working darling if you have a headache, just take a break." Surely his work was important but maybe he could find an hour to work later today if he felt so miserable.
She would just hold on to him and nuzzle close now that it seemed that the chair could hold them, what more could she say? She would hum again and nuzzle close. All that mattered was that he was feeling fine and she was okay with how he held her, okay with just everything and if he would look up (maybe because he realized he did no longer feel pain) she would kiss him softly on his lips. A nice enough distraction for now right? She would do it again and again as long as it was necessary to make him realize that she meant every word she said. She loved him and she would always do so, that's what she believed. He cared for her when she felt low and she needed someone like that in her life.
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Post by Giovanni Trapani on Aug 12, 2020 14:26:24 GMT -4
As he was resting against Nimue, he realized all his pain was whisked away. He felt no pain. And suddenly he felt cured! It was like magic! He perked up and raised his head out of her chest and looked at her. How did she do it? She just rubbed his temples! He would have to try that once when he felt pain! But now he was just dazed by looking at her. She looked him so lovingly. He felt like he could melt in her hands
Nimue asked him if he wants her to make pie or something. She also advised he should stop working if he has a headache. Due to being a bit dazed, Giovanni placed a hand on his forehead and said "M-my headache... I-is it's gone!" he exclaimed in surprise and wonder. Nimue the just held onto him and nuzzled close. He did the same. She then hummed, it sounded so wonderful and dare he say.... motherly.
And then suddenly Nimue kissed him. Being a selfish weakling he is, he kissed her back gently. He was still taken aback that she did it againa nd again. It really made him tear up. But in a more positive sense that she really did care about him. He just felt so guilty now. Guilty for being a villain that just causes her trouble and more work. Its not like he was gonna change his ways any time soon. But he for a moment imagined just what if.
He then managed to speak up a bit
"Listen N-Nimue. I'm sorry about before" he said as he wiped his eyes again. "I'm sorry for... for asking you... I mean... I know its confidental. But I kept pushing and wanting to know" he sighed "I- I" he was at a loss for words. He cant understand what she sees in him? Kindness? Caring? He was neither! When was he ever kind or caring? Handsome ok maybe. But still. He was just so in shock and awe that he was speechless
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Post by Nimue Nakahara on Aug 12, 2020 14:37:27 GMT -4
She watched him, biting her lip and having big eyes as she was afraid he would have seen her green eyes. She did not want to lie to him but she wanted to make him feel better. She smiled a little, while still biting her lip, "Yes?" But she would just look at him with so much love in her eyes that he should not need to worry about anything else. She would just make sure that he felt okay and she was smiling when he seemed to be so happy about it disappearing, "I am glad to hear but I would still offer to make you something if you want. Just take a break, my dear." She would nuzzle close to him, hold on to his shoulders, make sure to hide her face in the crook of his neck and humming before getting back up to kiss him. She decided in the few minutes of silence that it was a good idea. She was happy to notice he kissed her back no matter how often she would give him soft kisses again in that moment. She would eventually stop and lean with her head against his shoulder, a little slumped down wondering if she could make a lemon cake. They did have lemons, so that would work.
She looked up when he looked at her and she noticed he had been crying again and he was stammering over words and immediately a sense of worry fell over her face. She took his face in her hands and made him look at her. "Giovanni?" She did it again, just softly saying his name as a question, to make sure that he was okay and looking at her. "I understand why you did it. You want to know, you want to be prepared and interested in my job and that's alright. I would not mind trying to tell you a bit more but some things I cannot share but I can share what happened in more details probably then just the news paper, some names from my students and colleagues should remain a secret because that's how I like to work but I bet we can talk more, just give me time to adapt to it, to think about it? Alright?" Because it had gone wrong, it was her own paranoia, her own naive idea too that made her worry about spilling it. She wasn't afraid Giovanni would do bad to any of her students or colleagues, but what if he accidentally dropped their name to someone with bad intentions that would come to the restaurant one day, she had been there with Tony so why not villains?
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Post by Giovanni Trapani on Aug 12, 2020 16:03:29 GMT -4
Giovanni nodded "O-ok. We or you can make something." he said. Now he nuzzled close to her. She held on to his shoulders and hummed. He tried to match her humming melody as he wanted to hum along as well. His hummng was more shaky and maybe off note. Obviously, one note later after her as he didnt know what melody she hummed.
Nimue got up and kissed him. He kissed her back and for a bit they were in silence. Eventually Nimue stopped and leaned on her head against his shoulder. Slumped down. He wondered what she was thinking. But once his daze ended, Giovanni spoke up and apologized to her. She said his name softly and listened him. After which she spoke. He bit his lip listening to her.
"Y-yeah. But I dont want you to tr- try and tell me if you cant share. I- I dont want this. I-I dont want to feel as if I am guilting you into talking to me about that stuff. I-I felt so bad after that thing yesterday. I d-dont want to guilt you into that stuff. Y-yeah Im imens- immensly interested. B-But its not worth it. Not like this... ou- out of guilting you. T-Then I'd rather n-" he bites his lip as his tears rolls. He was swallowing his villainy here. He really did swallow it as he gulped before finishing the sentence "I'd r-rather not... know anything at all" there he said it.
She made him like this. He was not himself when around her. What was this spell she had with her. This air around her. His heart was pounding at the thought of using her. His his... it felt like his body rejected to use her. What was going on with him. He was a villain! Why wasnt he acting villanous then? Why does that evaporate around Nimue? Oh God. If anyone found out about this....
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Post by Nimue Nakahara on Aug 12, 2020 16:16:04 GMT -4
"I would like that, but only if you do?" She would say softly and brush his hair and smile at him, "If you want that or if you want me to leave you alone for a moment?" She wasn't sure but as he nuzzled close to her, she wasn't sure and she would hum and keep brushing through his hair and she was just hoping she would do fine she would just listen to him and try to hum a more known song and just kissed his forehead. God she loved him and she wished that she could take his pain away. But she couldn't and when they kissed and continued to enjoy the silence or well she hoped he did, she would wait a minute to talk.
She would sit upright and would just listen to his apology, answering with her concern and worry for him. She needed to get his attention, she needed him to listen to her and stop worrying. She felt only more worried when he continued. And she wanted him to hold her and she wanted to say something but she felt it, he was crying and she felt so much sorrow for him. "Oh- I am so sorry." She had no idea how bad of a thing it had been for him and she just felt guilty now for both sides of the story. I had no idea, I am just worried, I am just so unsure what I can say and what not. Maybe we can try a bit of both? Yea?" She held his shirt in her hands, holding her face against his chest. "I love you, I don't want you to feel so bad because I am unsure about what I can tell. You don't make me feel guilty when you ask me. I am just unsure, so please let's work it out together." She wanted him to hold her and to feel good, "Please baby don't cry. You mean more to me than my job." She would tell him everything if that made him feel better, she was sure of it.
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Post by Giovanni Trapani on Aug 14, 2020 16:07:30 GMT -4
He nodded, Nimue then suggested an alternative that if he wants she can leave him alone for a moment "No!!!" he said in a scared and panicked voice. He calmed down when he realize what he did and then spoke as he hugged her "I dont want to leave you"
Giovanni nuzzled her and she hummed gently as she kept brushing through his hair. Her hums were calming, so he hummed with her, albeit one note behind. Soon she hummed a more known song and he managed to hum together in perfect harmony. In unison. Soon she kissed his forehead and he just relaxed in her arms. He loved her and adored her with every fiber of her being. He loved her more than his career. The two soon kissed and enjoyed their silence together
But he had to apologize for before because that was eating him out. Nimue sat upright and listened to his apology. Once he was done, she said how sorry she was. She said she had no idea, how worried she is, how she is unsure what to say and what not to say. She said they can try a bit of both. He looked at her confused "Wha- huh?" he couldnt even phrase his question.
Nimue spoke how she loves him and that she doesnt want him to feel bad because of her unsureness. But she reassured him that he doesnt make her feel guilty. She just isnt sure. So she asked if they can work this out together. He calmed down and held her
"O-ok. Lets work it out" he gently told her, getting slowly a grip of himself
She gently told him not to cry. That he means more to her than her job. He held her
"I feel the exactly same way about you. I love you more than my career" he gently told her. "I love you so so much. I cant put it into words" then he kisses her on the lips
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