Can you Feel it? [Sean & Rowan]

Stuck in the lobby, sitting on one of the chairs she was a bit of lost in her thoughts. Wondering what to do. She did not feel like training but maybe she had to work on it simply and only because it was to be expected. She did not want to fail in any of the courses, heck she was the winner of last years Cavalry and she wasn't sure if she had picked smart by signing up for it again. This time she could not work together with Haru. That made her freeze, why did she remember that? And that's literally why she was sunken in deep thoughts in the chair in the lobby. She almost fell out of the chair, it wasn't smart to have slung both her legs over one side and lean against the other side, she quickly managed to hold herself and put her feet on the ground. She kept forgetting that Sean was here, not because she wanted to forget but because she could not believe it. She had no idea how he came here, no one had shared with her but she immediately blushed when she saw him. It had to do with her embarrassing moment as well as just the fact that seeing Sean brought these very weird feelings. She got up quickly while he talked so she could stand opposite him and she wondered how it felt to hug him again. Maybe she should try again? She bit her lip, "I don't like it." she mumbled, she was nervous, not feeling all too nice about it and she decided to do what she had wanted to try ever since Christmas and that's why she wrapped her arms softly around him, as he had done to her before and bury her face against his chest. "I wish we were home." She mumbled against his shirt, her face was bright red and she stared at the colour of his shirt and tried to think that this was normal. It was normal to hug people.

It was totally normal that you were red as a tomato, felt like exploding and that your heart was racing like crazy. Yes, totally normal. Rowan wanted to be held by no one else but Sean, she wanted to be happy and no worries as he showed her before. She wished that there was no such pressure on her shoulders, that she could just enjoy it for fun, that she could just be satisfied with him supporting her and her mother and grandmother but she just wished it meant she would not have to fight. She would prove her quirk worked the way she wanted but she seriously wished it was not necessary. Why make a competition out of something so dangerous?

She hid her face in his chest. Afraid of what she might say, which was the reason she had not answered yet. Rowan might be a person that worried too much about basically everything. She had told this to Sean before and he had not judged her, so maybe she should tell him now too why she wasn't happy. Why she didn't like it. But instead of saying that, she said she wanted to be home and she blushed and she wasn't happy and yet, he smelled nice. What kind of soap was that? Holding on to Sean, it was really distracting. It felt like she fitted perfectly in his arms too and she liked how he held her carefully and yet strong enough and she looked up a little when he talked about the U.K. and she smiled a little, was he trying to make a joke to distract her, because that was really sweet. She felt quiet when he spoke to her again though, that was not a joke and she shortly looked at his lips, while he spoke. Wondering what they tasted like and she blushed and tried to focus on Sean's eyes. Ehm, what did she just think?

"I mean, I can't remember anything from last year, I feel like a freak and my power, what if I hurt someone really badly, would they forgive me?" She snuggled closer into him, he wanted to help her, he wanted to listen to her. No one ever said that to her. She was afraid that if she hurt someone that the bad thoughts would return, even though it wasn't possible, she wanted to be a hero, now more than ever. She had managed to find control, to work on control, let her please become better at it and protect her family and... and protect Sean.

Maybe that's always what she wanted? She remembered that her first hug, like the real deal made her freak out and now? She ran exactly into the arms of the person that hugged her for the first time. She did not want Sean to let her go. It felt so comfortable and nice and she wanted to stay in this perfect little spot, it made her feel like she was invisible for the rest of the world and maybe even invincible but she wasn't entirely sure about that over the sound of her panic. She had never told him, about Lady, that saying she also did not really have the time when it was happening and before Sean got hurt and did this make her selfish? She did not want to tell anyone about Lady anymore, as long as she could avoid it, she would. She had not told Chimera or Charlie and she wasn't going to tell Sean and push him away because of it, or worse... make him freak out and leave her side. She hid her face again and when he said her name softly she looked up, blushing again. She made a squeaky sound as she had not expected him to snuggle her but she quickly followed his example. "Thank you." Was all that mattered and all she wanted to say.

Though Sean wasn't done, he would also talk to her. She felt her face heat up when he gave her so many compliments and her eyes looked at his face, was he blushing? She looked at his lips again, should she- no wow, calm down. She gave him a little smile for what he told her. It really made her feel better, heck there was a whole storm in her stomach and- wait a second... she only blushed more now that she finally realized the answer. Oh shoot, what had she done before, she needed to think but she could not think Sean was distracting her and in a good way for sure. "Oh no, I gained control during my internships and I realized what I could do, it's just my fear, fire can do a lot of damage." Explosions included but he hugged her tightly and she giggled a little, "But this already soothes me." she mumbled though as close as they were that must be easily heard by him.

She heard what he said. But that did not mean she could speak up, she wanted him... to be by her side like he was now. To talk to her when she felt this way and make her feel happy and not stupid or freakish or anything. She needed Sean in her life. She thought about his smile a lot the other day and just about Sean. But it was a scary thing wasn't it? To say such words out loud. "I just need you like this." This time, Rowan spoke a little louder but it wasn't much of a confession and she thought it was maybe better to not do so anyway. He was here because... because... why was he here?

Was she hearing things that were not there? So tightly hugged in his arms made her feel that his heart was beating as fast as hers. She wished it, she wished she dared to open up about that specifically to Sean but she did not dare. She just felt rather happy. That she was there and was soothed about the issues and just feel herself and how he complimented her and made her feel at ease. She thanked him and she smiled back at the young man as he replied to her. For the first time in her life, or the first time that she had realized she might be bothersome, she did not feel that way. She felt like she was exactly there where she wanted to be. She smiled therefore back at him with a little small and she tried to let it all go. It would be fine and all, she felt so relieved and strangely she felt happy.

She explained to him though that she worked hard in the meantime or the last year to get control over her quirk back. It was a hard thing to do and it had taken her all school year but that was fine, as long as it was on time for here. "I heard I was a twat last year and I feel so bad for being here, it makes me nervous to go to the school and not remember." She did not want to bring it up, she did not want Sean to worry about what happened in the past. "I try to consider it is in the past, and it shouldn't bother me that much anymore." She had to be optimistic, that's what Sean told her. She looked up at him with surprise as he said it was also providing light and warmth and she blushed again but with a little soft smile on her face. "I like that view of fire more." She had not thought about it, she had always thought of it negatively.

She realized they were still hugging and thought for a second if she should take a step back but she wanted to keep this warm and happy feeling. And she had now linked it to hugging Sean and put her cheek against him again and closed her eyes as she listened to his heartbeat. If he did not push her away or took a step back yet, she could linger on a little more right? She did tell him that she just needed him here. Still not entirely sure how to confess and if she could confess. She at this point did not even realize that she had not for one-second thought about someone else but only about Sean. Which might be something she would think about later. She blushed intensely when he said her name and she opened her eyes and looked up at his own red cheeks. "I like that." She did smile satisfied, well at least he wasn't going.

She looked up surprised though when he said he needed her, just like this, nothing else and she stared at him with surprise. "Sean." But, she couldn't say more, she could not form sentences, but she liked it. It made her heart skip a beat. But she should let go of him eventually, considering that she could not stand here all the time. "I cannot thank you enough." was the best she could do right now.

She looked up at him. It was impossible what she thought, it wasn't that he got mad because of the word right? She was a freak last year, she was mean and whatever it is that they called her. It was just the nerves and being so angry at herself that she could not control it. What should she do? But it was, he was flabbergasted, lost for words because of what she said, maybe not only the word but the whole thing. She wanted to kiss him. There and then she admitted the feeling to herself. That was enough right? Enough to understand that she was just head over heels for Sean and not anyone else. She did not think about anyone else, it was just Sean, his beautiful and kind words and his smile and his everything was simply to die for.

But she didn't think she would be making a smart move if she kissed him. She didn't trust herself. Not for one bit, but she could hear his compliments, it kept ringing in her ear in a good way, nice, amazing, beautiful, all the words he called her. She did not believe that she was ever showered in compliments like that. "I really like that, I can learn from you, your kindness, your ability to enjoy just the moment. I want to learn that all, from you." Yes, that would mean they spend more time together and maybe she would find the perfect moment to tell him. No one first kissed and then told about their feelings right? No, but she couldn't get the words over her lips so she would have to find that courage and just tell him later. Now she was a bundle of nerves already so that didn't help.

Maybe like Chimera said before, it was high time to start ignoring the past and just make the present better, yea, focus on that, it would be fine. She had to look forward like he said, it might be a lot safer and so on, focusing on becoming a real hero instead of only why she joined before. It was everything and nothing at once and it should become her goal. She had plans, she should work them out in the new year and so on. She would just let this moment happen, she would tell him later, she would be able to remember this moment and tell him later. She was more comfortable in his arms now. She did open her eyes to talk to him and his blushy cheeks were really cute and it was a miracle that she did not blush even more but she did smile. It was like a sort of victory dance that she felt in the pit of her stomach. Or maybe, tell him now? Why the heck not? She was already nervous so it couldn't be added to that, she was also already close in his arms, and she could potentially kiss him after, that sounded like a win-win situation.

Wait, her smile faltered a bit, what if he didn't like her? Are you crazy, she asked herself, he just showered you in compliments. Yes, but that was Sean, wasn't it? He was kind to everyone. But what he said next made her flutter her eyelashes and feel the storm of butterflies in her stomach. Okay well, he was so happy to meet her, and grateful and thinking about how to keep her happy. She should say it but he said something first, he said her name again and he hackled.

Was he... was he going to confess to her or push her away? To make sure to clear up what she thought and to make sure he didn't break her heart later? Yes, Rowan always went for straight doom scenario. She took a step back, she was afraid. She did not want this moment to end in something terrible, she had opened up herself too much. Thought about him too much, ooh what should she do. She kept looking at him, in his eyes and a frown on her forehead, the corners of her mouth turned down, but she wanted to hear it. "Yes?" she asked softly until she heaved up her shoulders visibly as someone in the hallway sort of screamed her name.

In a shrill voice someone had come down the elevator (several people had already done so but not this woman), "Rowan Haruka Sakamoto, what is taking you so long, leaving your old grandmama all to vend for herself, this is unbelievable young lady and I demand you to come with me right now." Seriously... that old hag was able to come and yell at her now. Her foul mood spreading to Rowan and she sighed. She took Sean's hand and heard her grandmother use her full name again, "We talk later okay, she has been a nag all week. I am really sorry. I will see you during the match, I hope?"

Everything was perfect. Everything was everything. Everything she wanted, everything she hoped for, she felt super awkward herself as it was Sean that let her open up to hugs and the like but she couldn't get over the fact that she only had attention for him. Zoomed in onto one person in her life and she was like, what. Yes, she wanted to learn to do such things as well but only from Sean. So many thoughts had crossed her mind when she looked at him and when he gazed into her eyes, she blushed a little and first looked away before shyly returning to his gaze. She smiled though, she wished it was a better time. Yes, she would have to confirm, she would tell him after the events if it would go on like this that she was in love with him. Yes, that was how Miku said it right? You felt it and you knew. Well, she knew, she knew now and she would want to tell him, in a better moment.

But that's why she got an internal moment of panic as he did not seem to get further than saying her name and saying I. She frowned and looked worried, what if he tried to break it to her softly that she, no that they, it would be bad. She looked at him, she heard her name again and a word that. Her thought process stopped and she flinched by hearing her name be yelled in the foyer of the hotel. People stopped, people stared and she wanted to hide behind Sean. God this was crazy, this was ridiculous. "You didn't." She said as she took his hand and looked up at him before looking at her grandmother shortly. "Really, she has been nagging all day, she kicked me away because my sighing was boring her and now she calls me. It's unfair." Should she? She took a few steps away, but please come to her match, she would see him there, right? He would have to come? He would be there to cheer for her and she let slowly go of his hand. She told her grandmother she was already coming with a little bit (if not much) annoyance in her voice. But she stopped and turned around quickly.

Sean had hugged her, but it felt so wrong to end their whatever it was in that way and she hurried back to him. Tiptoed and kissed him on the cheek again. As she had done that day in the hospital, as he had done the day in the hospital. "Let's talk again soon." Had he said, love? Had she heard that right? She wasn't sure at all, maybe her brain wanted to hear it and filled it in. She quickly hurried back to her grandmother and disappeared into the hallway where the elevators were. She felt impatient, she felt her blood boiling. Why at that exact moment? Were they spying on her, but she did not say anything of that out loud. She would wait, get into the elevator and just not say anything at all until they reached their suite. She would just hide in her room, she wanted to cry and scream and yell.