The Best Part of Battle is the Banter || [Tournament R:1]

Yojin was pretty damn sure he’d gotten the best possible first match. Some UA teacher had to be having a hell of a laugh, putting him up against his best friend and roommate first round. Maybe it was meant to be learning experience--something about being able to face your friends. More likely, the staff just had a warped sense of humor.

That was fine with Yojin--he was laughing all the way to the ring.

Not that today’s earlier matches hadn’t done their damndest to spoil his mood. He’d been steadily filling with nerves as the day progressed and classmates staggered into the Infirmary, bruised emotionally and physically. Ironic, since he’d volunteered at the infirmary to keep himself from going crazy fidgeting with his gear. Instead, he’d gotten a front-line seat to how many UA kids couldn’t handle losing a fight in public.

Well, he wasn’t going to let it rattle him.

Last time, he’d walked into the arena a nervous wreck, sweating under the lights and stare of the crowd.

This time, Yojin had decided to arrive in style.

When the signal to come out came, a cube-shaped mecha stomped out of the gate on four spidery legs, turning back and forth to wave at the crowd with stumpy mechanical arms. Inside, Yojin grinned to himself, reaching down to press a button on the dash, causing a foghorn to blare from somewhere in the crowd. He could see the faces fixed on him, but inside the cab, he was perfectly comfortable--no one could see him. All they saw was the Bumblebox.

He liked having his work in the spotlight.

Chimera looked weirdly small as they both approached the ring. It was unsettling to have the height advantage on his friend.

Not so bad. I could get used to it.

For a moment, he almost felt bad--but, come on! This was for fun! Yojin wasn’t here to play dirty tricks, or try hard. He was here to show off his gear, show off that he’d improved. Worst that happened, one of them got beat up and went down to the loser's bracket. Last year, Yojin had electrocuted himself on camera and gotten knocked out in the first round. Anything was a step up from that.

“Both, Chimmy!” Yojin replied, his voice booming from the robot’s speakers. “Come on, haven't you been curious about what this can actually do?"

The cameras weren’t the highest definition, but Yojin could see that behind the bravado, Chimera was feeling uncomfortable.

And for some reason, that deflated some of Yojin’s hype, and made him feel a little guilty.

Or are you guilty because you want to date his sister?

Yojin swallowed, suddenly realizing that if he somehow let that slip, it’d change the stakes of the tournament SIGNIFICANTLY.

Yeah, you'll be limping into the infirmary, or maybe a graveyard.

Was there any way Chimera could have known? He'd find out eventually. God. Yojin should have told him. Should have asked him.

He wanted to keep this match friendly and fun. He was a support--in the end, his career didn’t depend on tournaments, it was just for pride.

Chimera losing to a support student, even an unhinged genius might sting a little more. And Chimera was used to being the strong one in their friendship. And...well, there was some shit that could go wrong here.

Yojin groaned, then popped open the hatch on the top, using his quirk to tilt the Bumblebox forward on its legs, clasping the stumpy arms together so it was bowing to Chimera. At the same time, Yojin climbed out of the top, revealing his face--well, he was wearing a helmet, so he had to raise his visor--to the crowd, and bowing as well. It wasn’t mocking, though he was grinning.

He'd sworn he wouldn't get nervous, but Yojin's nerves were singing, twisting in his stomach. He could feel the eyes of the crowd burning into him.

“Come on. You know how many toasters this thing is made of.” He said quietly. "Let's do this, fuzzball."

The mecha held out a hand for Chimera to shake, before raising back into a fighting stance.

Yojin grinned, a weight falling off his shoulders when Chimera replied to his banter. Right. They were chill. This fight was chill. They were here to rock this arena. This was--

“--Hey! Fu--” Yojin yelped in surprise, snapping his visor shut and ducking back into the Bumblebox as Chimera suddenly moved. He was slower than the goat, even if he didn’t have as far to go--before he’d fully processed what was going on, the mecha lurched backwards, the front armor crumpling a good four inches inward. Yojin’s jaw clacked together, reeling and almost falling for a moment, but his lower body was inside the mech, there was nowhere to fall but in.

Luckily, the Bumblebox’s wide, spread legs were good at keeping it stable, but it still slid backwards nearly two meters--Yojin instinctively tapped into his quirk, yellow sparks tracing down the thick, wire-covered gauntlets on his hand. Like a leg coming back to life after falling asleep, he felt the machine, the steady whirr of the engine as gasoline exploded again and again, driving pistons to work, the hum of electricity through the wiring, everything sharp and prickly and new.

He dug in the treads without thinking. It was as natural as steadying his own body during a fall. Piloting the Mecha like this was still strange--it was a goddamn complicated beast, and Yojin felt like his brain was getting split in half while using it, but his quirk gave him much more instinctive control than a joystick, for example, would.

“Cheap shot.” Yojin muttered, his distracted tone betraying his sudden focus. Chimera would recognize it easily--it was the tone Yojin used when he was working. Which was to say, most of the time.  "Cheap shots are my thing."

Yojin scuttled backwards, strafing a slow circle around his opponent, trying to keep the distance created by Chimera’s attack. How many hours had he spent theorycrafting this fight, running through the angles of approach? On foot, on his moped, in a mecha--thinking of gear and tactics to defeat his friend. It sounded rude, but...well…

Yojin liked overplanning battles. It was his biggest advantage. The ability to adapt to his opponent.

“...Wasn’t counting on you getting the first hit.” He continued to mutter through the speaker, almost thinking out loud. Another thing Chimera was probably used to, though usually it was during a shared project, not a battle. “You know why I cut the armor? Otherwise, it wouldn’t be fast enough to keep distance; kite you with the lightning gun. You remember the lightning gun, right?”

Sure enough, the second stumpy arm had begun to whine, the air around it crackling with static and the smell of ozone. Yojin revved the engine, making sure the battery had more than enough power--and creating a small cloud of white smoke from the back of the box. Layering his second line of attack, even as he aimed his first.

“Zzzzap.” He muttered, staring through the camera, and raising his glove in a finger-gun motion, pointing as his friend. And with that, an arc of white lightning crackled through the air.

Yojin blinked his eyes as the rock exploded, wincing in unexpected sympathy for Chimera. He’d built the gun to be non-lethal, but sharp chips of rock could cut, or even blind his friend. Goddamnit! Leave it to Chim to make it harder on himself. Yojin peered into the cloud of shrapnel, trying to get a read on the damage, then--

--Chunk of rock flew back at him.

Stupid Hesitation!

Yojin clenched his fists, turning the ‘Box and trying to drive it backwards, but it was a sturdy machine, not precisely nimble. And Chimera had a good toss--all Yojin could do is catch it on an angle.

The 'Box shook, belching smoke and groaning as the rocks caught it on the side. The turn saved the turret, but...

Yojin felt the armor of the leg joint crumple, stressed pneumatics breaking loose around the knee--He flexed his quirk, and leg twitched and sparked, unresponsive. For a moment, he thought it wouldn’t work, but after a panicky second, it moved, groaning and shaking. It was maimed, dragging with each step.

Yojin pulled his hands back, focusing on movement, and the Bumblebox scuttled back further, the engine roaring and straining, having to compensate for the injured leg. The front armor was pretty banged up as well--weakened from Chimera’s first hit, and chipped around the corner, sharp, jagged edges exposed.

While he moved, he tried to think, struggling to adapt his plan under fire. Chimera had a hell of a throw, and he’d just turned Yojin’s best weapon into offense. Did he need to close? Try to bowl him down with raw strength, and with the close-range defense measures?

But…

“Not going to get close. Good throw, but you’re just wrecking cover. Think I hit harder.” Yojin muttered, both to himself, and through the speakers on front. God, was he right? Even if his gun was stronger, he’d built Chimera’s armor himself as well. Who could take more hits if they fought like tanks, just bombarding each other from range until one broke? Was there something he was forgetting? Wait. “...Think I outrange you.”

Yeah. His lightning probably arched further than his friend could accurately throw. And if Chimera tried to close distance, well….he was leaving a smoke trail to cover his retreat.

With new resolve, Yojin made the Bumblebox limp backwards, taking it to the very edge of the arena, leaving a trail of exhaust in his wake. Ozone started to crackle again as he charged the gun for a second shot. The battery couldn’t sustain a persistent barrage, but hopefully, he wouldn’t need too many more shots. He tracked Chimera with another shot, aiming down his finger, and changing the focus range. Less direct power, larger area…and this time he was ready to shoot at the any counter-rocks.

Yojin let out a nervous laugh, and bent his fingers into a pistol shape.

Bang!

There it was!

Yojin’s heart started to pound as Chimera broke cover, and charged in. It was the only choice that made sense--once Yojin backed off, Chimera couldn’t win the ranged battle, so he had to close…

His friend was fast--

But Yojin had been ready, he’d already widened the area of his attack at the cost of damage. He let out a whoop of excitement as lightning crackled across the stage, again, blinded for a moment by the cloud of smoke and brilliant flash--

Then the whole mecha lurched, the search of twisting metal filling the air.

Fuck!

It hadn’t been enough to stop Chimera.

Yojin was still blinded by his own attack, but he felt the exposed joint of the Bumblebox’s leg snap, the maimed limb buckling completely, exposed wiring sparking, pnematic fluid and oil spraying across the grass of the tournament ground. When the flash faded, Yojin saw that it was dangling uselessly, only connected by a few leaking hoses.

More importantly, Yojin saw that Chimera had...expanded. Or rather, his fur had expanded.

The mecha wobbled back and forth, Yojin’s hyena-like laughter echoing out of the speakers.

“Chimera. Oh god. Just a second. You need a mirror. You need to see yourself right now.” Yojin laughed, trying to keep the three-legged mecha from falling over. “You’re like a giant loofa. Like a ball of yarn. Oh god. This is getting recorded, right?”

All thoughts of battle had abandoned Yojin’s mind for a moment--he was too busy staring at his friend, and cackling hysterically.

“You know, it never occured to me to install an anti-static dampener. Maybe if you let me win I’ll think about it? You...you’re like a cotton-candy sculpture from a fair. Gods. Can you move? I--I can’t shoot you right now. You’re so fluffy.”

The mecha continued to wobble back and forth, and Yojin might have continued to laugh at his friend’s misfortune if Chimera hadn’t had a look of absolute murder in his eyes. Right. The fight.

Yojin started charging up the gun again, slower, wobbling the mecha to face Chimera, making sure to wobble back into a cloud of the exhaust fumes. It was a diversion, though. As hard as it was to focus with tears of amusement streaming down his face, Yojin had planned this part. Even if he was missing one leg, each other leg had an anti-personnel blast of rubber bullets ready to go.

He waited for Chimera to go in, and then, at the last moment, twisted and fired, a loud pop echoing from the “mine” on the kneecap, and a spray of pink rubber bullets flying with enough force to knock a grown man to their knees.

Yojin let out a yelp of surprise when Chimera vanished out of sight, and then the box jolted into the air. For a moment, he was flying, nausea rising in his throat as the ground and sky tumbled through the camera, before he suddenly stopped, his head slamming against the padded seat, and the very unpadded dashboard of the mecha. He whiplashed back and forth a few more times before settling to a stop, lying flat on his back in the pilot chair.

“Ow. Fuck. Ow!” Yojin mumbled, shaking his head. His head was spinning, little white lights flashing in his eyes, echoes of spike-y, headachey pain keeping him from using his quirk. He should have disconnected when he’d first gotten thrown. That way, he might not have had to feel it.

Even after more than a year of progress on both of their sides, Chimera was still unfairly fucking strong.

Maybe this was karmic justice for the whole thing with Angie.

Yojin giggled manically aloud.

Ugh. He felt like he was going to throw up, and he only had seconds to figure out what to do. From the way gravity was...gravitying, the Bumblebox was on its side, which was a bit of a bitch, all things considered. He’d built it to be hard to knock over, but...well, he might be able to get it to stand up, but…

Not fast enough. Not with my head ringing.

Yojin swallowed, aware he had no time to hesitate, and forced himself to move. He kicked down the drive pedal, and the mecha began to futilely wiggle its legs forward like a turtle on its back trying to walk. The engine choked and heaved, overheating from the damage and strain, exhaust once again pooling around the upended mecha. This was bad smoke though, different than before, the thick white smoke of someone destroying their own engine, of oil and coolant all going up in flames.

Yojin took a deep breath, and held it, then ripped off both of his control gauntlets, tearing them free of the tangle of wires that connected it to the box.

Then he reached up, and popped open the escape hatch.

Chimera couldn’t see any of this--only the bottom of the mecha and the kicking legs, all shrouded by the thick cloud of burning exhaust. So Yojin was hidden as he wiggled out of the crippled mecha, and crawled to the nearest bit of cover. A rock.

As Chimera approached the mecha to deliver the final blow, Yojin slid his tiny electrified pistol from the holster at his hip, circling around behind his friend. An utterly dishonorable surprise attack.

He sighted down the barrel, took aim, and fired, the gun letting out a quiet whine as it launched a paintball slug of conductive gel, then fired a shock bolt behind it.

“Hey Chimera! Sucker Punch!”