Midnight Parenting [G & H]

all the pieces lie where they fell...

Before she got up, she was pushed back into bed, very softly, not very problematic but she made a soft pushy sound as she fell back into her pillow. She appreciated that kiss on her cheek. "You are my hero." She muttered rather sleepy so it wasn't very loud but she turned to her side and almost fell immediately asleep. Her mind still making a lot of ideas and what she had and had not yet said to Gil about their potential plans, she could not wait about setting up the idea of the gym, if it all would work out, that would be amazing and she loved it so much.

But her hazy dream about everything and nothing at the same time changed into a nightmare, she had it more often, she had simply not dropped and told that issue to G because she thought it was because of the hospital and that it would be over as soon as she would be home. But she started to toss and turn without making a sound, maybe it had to do without G next to her as he was still with Kai or that she fell asleep in this busy mind state. She gasped as she set up straight again, waking up about an hour later, albeit it felt so much later and the bed next to her was still empty and she looked worried and quickly got out of the bed to look into the room next door, she took a relieved breath when she noticed G still in the room next door with Kai, everything must be fine. She leaned against the doorpost to watch her fiance and her son and finally calmed down a little more and smiled finally. "have you been here all the time?" She was just rather happy with that right now, was Kai asleep?

all the pieces lie where they fell...

She rubbed her left eye with her left hand while leaning with her head against the door, watching her son sleep while sucking softly on his dad's finger and it made her giggle in silence. "At least an hour." She said when G asked her how much time has passed and she walked to the little bed and pulled the blanket back, "I think we all should sleep, don't you?" She told her fiance as she simply let him, she would not take the baby from him, she would let him bring Kai back to bed and she simply considered what to do herself. "I don't like to sleep without you." Also because of the nightmares but it might be not the most strategic part to tell him that now, she simply let it be, for now, it would be okay to tell him later or when it was all over it would not be necessary to tell him. She would walk back to the doorpost and wait for G to be done, she was sure hoping that he would be fine with it, she suddenly started to worry about it. "Gil?" She wanted to walk to him but she did not and held both her own hands to stop fumbling and placed them in front of her chest, "If you-if you want some alone time with Kai, I can try." She bit her lip in worry and looked to the floor to avoid his eyes, she wasn't sure how she would do that, she definitely had her son always on her mind, especially now that there were no nurses watching over him in the hospital but that they were home. What should she do if he said yes, help mini panic attack!

She should turn away and head back to their part of the room, maybe clean up a bit, to get the sleep out of her eyes, the nightmare far away locked in the back of her mind, yes maybe splash some water on her face in the bathroom. She was obviously panicking.

all the pieces lie where they fell...

As much as G was doing whatever he could to combine time and so on, she was panicking. Why was she so selfish, she basically asked for their time all the time, she did not give them a minute with just the two of them, oh god, what was she doing, why was she so selfish, she turned away from Kai's bedroom when she noticed Goliath, not entirely hearing what G said, she just made that assumption, but would that be good for their baby, he had his own room for a reason, they shouldn't just drag his little crib into their room because, because of a thousand reasons and she did not want to cry or make matters worse, she simply went into the bathroom to clean her face and tried to swallow her stupid pride or her stupid selfishness to not start crying about nothing and not flip or freak out completely. She went back into their bathroom, but she was like a zombie, not knowing what to do. She did not want to ruin their night, it had gone well, they had been together, they had this great night together and now, now she was ruining everything again with her stupid self.

When she got back into the room, G asked for a little help and she nodded, biting her lip, not saying a word and went to grab Kai's pacifier from next to his blankets and slowly leaned over the crib side, by tiptoeing, to make sure that she would help G, by softly pulling his hand and quickly as soon as Kai let go of his finger, putting the pacifier in his mouth as a replacement, their boy did not open his eyes, let out a sigh and simply slept on by sucking on the pacifier for now. She looked at him without saying anything, get your stupid self over it Hanako, he would have answered your question if he disliked it and he found a solution. She quickly turned her eyes away, jealous of her own fiance and son, it must not be getting worse any day now, she went to sit on the edge of the bed, holding her own hand with the other to not make any reckless movements or so on.

all the pieces lie where they fell...

She didn't say anything, she looked up with her blue eyes on sad and she almost pouted after he kissed her but she did not, her face was rather neutral and she hated how she was ruining their perfect night, being home was great but suddenly dark thoughts just hit her mind. Maybe it was the nightmare, maybe she saw things that weren't there but that did not change how she was doing now, she did not want to say anything but held on to G and buried her face against his chest, in his arms. She was okay with sharing, she used to be, but she wasn't so sure if she could now and that was ridiculous, it was her son, it was the man she loved, she could give them a minute or more with just the two of them right. Maybe it were just dark thoughts because of the lack of sleep right now, the nightmares taking over in daylight or well night time because of how tired she was. Because she barely slept and she tried to recall how she felt an hour ago or something like that and she looked up at him and a soft chuckle escaped her lips as he said goodnight and good morning in one go. She kissed him softly and nuzzled back in his arms. Trying to hold on to that sense.

A couple of hours later, it was about six-thirty in the morning Kai cried again and Hana bumped her head against G, it did not hurt but she rubbed her forehead as she had bumped against his shoulder and she kept her eyes closed, it was again breakfast time or whatever you wanted to call it that and she probably would get out of bed anyway. Her own body was complaining that it wanted to eat something too. She sleepy got up, this time faster than the previous two times to lift her son out of his little crib, that she almost missed as she on auto-pilot walked to the door to his room and looked at the crib next to it. She made soft shushing noises as she swung him a little up and down to make him calm down, "Mommy is here." She let him suck on her little finger as she had to find a moment to keep her eyes correctly open and see what she was doing herself and focus. It took a few minutes but at least Kai was quiet for a while before she could make sure he would be able to eat as she sat back on the bed.

all the pieces lie where they fell...

all the pieces lie where they fell...