Welcome Back (Nimue)

she wanted to mock him, which was easy considering her back was turned to him, but she did not. Out of respect and love for him but she still did not think he got it. Yes, she wanted him safe, but most of all, she did not want him to be killed. She did not say anything, she just chewed on the inner side of her lip and said nothing. She would just look at him as he would sit down and she uncorked the wine, held it up in a silent question and if he would nod or get any other indication that he wanted it and would pour the red wine in both glasses. Could the food not come, so she could after that say she was tired and get to bed. She did not know how to deal with it but she said nothing, she was probably the drama queen then, right? Why not, so she said nothing and just would go back to the kitchen to get the last stuff before she would take a seat opposite him and put her phone next to her plate and look at it. She wasn't sure what to do in the silence.

She wanted to ask him again if he really did but she didn't. She said nothing and she looked just at him as he talked and was just not sure what to say at all. She sighed when he was done talking though, "In general I would say yes, the romantic idea it's amazing but I thought you would understand my fear, I would rather not even do this job but it's the best I can do. But I do a bad job if I cannot protect you," She almost choked on the next words, "I lost someone before you, I don't want to do that again." She looked away again, tapped her phone to see the time and something along the lines if she had a message; of course not. "I don't want you to lose friendships or whatever over me." What if one day this fell through and they would have no one else, where were their friendships then? Hm? She did not want to say anything anymore, she wanted food and rest. She felt like she was making this horrible instead of actually having a conversation. Why did she start talking about this actually? "I am just asking you to be careful and not get on the wrong side of heroes, I get you didn't know it but still he was trying to rescue us, you didn't even trust me when I said it."

She would fill his glass but still keep a pouty face on. She watched him though, while she lifted up her own glass, she watched but he did not say anything, instead he took a sip of his wine and she would explain that she wouldn't mind his courage, his words, his romance but he did not understand her fear. She wanted him to understand how much she did not want heroism to exist but it did for several reasons. She had to explain it but she felt like she shouldn't pronounce these words out loud, it was just... it was too much. She tried so hard to explain and it felt like she couldn't get the point accross than how would she protect him? She watched him, her eyes looking up and following him, she did not want him to walk away and not watch over her and she felt like crying again and then she felt his arms wrapped around her and she leaned against him.

Please hold her, be vareful, she wanted him to be careful. She just leaned against him, holding her arms around him as well as she held on to chest. She reluctantly let him go, she hated fighting. She hated how she got angry about something so small, that was just stupid. She would get up from the table when she learned the food was here and she wanted to help prepare. She would open the bags Giovanni got and took out the small tapas-side dishes that she put on the table so they could get whatever they wanted and share at the same time. She did not say much as she prepared and she only stopped, her eyes still on the table when he apologized, zhe did not know what to say. "Let's just hope it never happens again." She mumbled as she continued before sitting down again and would want to say something but what. "You should try this." She pointed at the new sort of egg roll, more like her own home a sort of dumpling, so she should try and feed him, try to be romantic and cute.

So they fell silent while continuing to unpack their food and getting everything ready to start eating. She did not know what to say after he agreed and it was just silent. She did not want to consider it, continue her thoughts. She did not want to consider she might be taken again and she absolutely did not want to even think for one second about the opportunity that next round they would take Giovanni. She did decide not to give up, but she needed to get rid of her naive and childish behaviour. She did consider herself a realist, but did that mean that aiming for becoming better would change her into someone who thought more negatively? She did not want to, that would make her work and thus her life a living hell every single second of the day. How would someone survive?

So she would focus on trying to do something else and give him an egg roll, it wasn't exactly that as they did not order Asian food but more like Spanish/South American food and she would want him to try. Funny how cultures overlapped without knowing each other for decades but she blushed a little too when she noticed he did. Not entirely sure if it was a good thing they did this or not at all. She wasn't sure if he was angry at her, though he more sounded bumped out but was it just over, conversation over and done with? Better to think that. She watched as she wanted to know if he liked it and smiled a little when he made the hand gesture and looked at the food, as to pick something for herself, but he returned the gesture. She opened her mouth, made a soft "aah" sound and would just hold her hand in front of her lips when she was munching on it. She nodded, trying to smile a little more.

She smiled a little more, blushed a little again as he kissed her on the cheek and she tried to fuzz over the food on the table that it should not fall over or something like that. She would bit her lip to try to hide most of her smile, but it was obvious that his kiss on her cheek helped a lot. She was doing fine now and it was just because he knew how to fix it, she did not want to stay in the vicious loop. She took a sip of her wine and looked at him and even though there were no words, she was okay with it.

She would look up just after she put the food in her mouth and blinked in curiosity and surprise. She did not really like to think about the villain list but she sort of understood people were hyped about it so she would just have to consider what peoples sked about it and she frowned, "It's probably the dullest answer ever, but I don't really care? My job is to stop crime, I am not really looking at the person. Surely I do, to learn, and know what to do to protect myself if I encounter someone, if that information is there." She put her fork down and thought about it, there wasn't really something or someone on her list to consider, "I understand that the government makes a list of the ten most dangerous people that are around there, but the list isn't very useful, for as far as I remember the last four are not really well known, leader of some gang, a mafia boss, an informant and a drug dealer. How do we know who they are and how to stop them. We should focus more on people that we know how they look and so on, and just make a general warning about trusting your own bank and not borrow money or lend money from other institutions or people and not use drugs." She took something from the plate that was in front of her to cut it already in smaller pieces and thought about it a little more. "Surely I do think some of those are definitely not worth discussing, in the sense of if I ever encounter them again, I know there is no chance they will try to redeem themselves, such as Crowley. I don't know them in any sense, it is just that, every illegal thing and on the scale of what they do, makes them bad people that should be dealt with." She did not like this conversation which was obvious on their face but she tried to explain and gave him a wry smile, "Does that help?"

She did not like discussing it because there was no manual on what you could tell your caring boyfriend about your job so what could she say about villains? They suck? That was about it, but she tried to at least explain it a little bit that it was not the person that mattered to her but what they did. Surely the information that Crowley used crows under his control was useful but she did not need to drink a cup of tea with the guy to get his goals and dreams. No, some of them definitely did belong in jail or worse, but she did not want to think that bad, she did not get what the list, in general, had to do, the just generic villains at the end confused her, "Even though they are generic crimes, they seemed to have done it a lot and got away with it, so it's definitely noteworthy, the thing is..." she sighed, "There must be twenty others like that out there and they don't have a name, the government should make a general list of warnings with crime ratio that got improved or something and warn them for that instead of a person. It's like giving them attention like you said, achievements, it's weird." She quickly put another egg roll in her mouth so she could shut up instead of ranting about things she did not want to say. "Soon they will publish the hero list, I don't look forward to that either."

She blew a piece of her hair from her bangs away with a huff, as if she was the little mermaid who lost her voice. She nodded, Thundershock, The Oracle, Lady Lavande, Crowley, and probably Ishtar was new on that list but after that breakout, she should be up and ready to get her ass into jail. Ugh, she really did not like this conversation. "Killing isn't because who are we to decide who lives or not, but yea they played God too, so why can't we good guys." But she looked away, lost her appetite as she realized she had considered killing the Oracle, but she couldn't and to be honest, she was happy that she couldn't. She did not want to think about G trying to kill Thundershock and the consequences of that, so another thing that kept her from eating more. She tried to, playing with her food was the result of it until a short silence fell. She did not like that he felt she kept secrets, "I don't know what I am allowed to talk about and whatnot. I don't want to reprimanded for something, I like my job in a way." But the silence continued and she put the food on her fork and dropped it off, wondering what to say until he asked another question.

"I don't really know, it did not happen in my time or with my consult. I would say everyone deserves a second chance, up until a point and that would not be a way of living if you are always stuck indoors. But how can you be certain that someone really won't fall back in their old habits? I think there need to be consistent meeting points, maybe even a sort of buddy system with a person that is legally a wise person to hang out with, an inspiration, a hero maybe but also a good government civilian or anything really. I really don't know." And she rather at this point did not think about it. When did someone cross the line of redemption and when did they not?

She looked up when she heard the scooting of the chair and he took her hand and talked soothing to her and she looked him in the eye. She gave him a small smile, "Just remember it's not that I don't want to tell you." She was kind of glad that he understand and that he even pointed out that he understood she wanted him to be safe and secure. She looked at their hands when he explained and nodded. She tried to chuckle a little when he said the word housewife. "Well you cook better than I do, but you kiss better than you cook." She stuck out her tongue to show him that she was joking but maybe she was serious as well, just a simple tease.

She looked a little more surprised and worried when he seemed to be lost for words and her worry only was more visible when he said he felt useless. It stung her because she did not want him to feel that way, not at all. She got up and climbed on his lap, held up her legs and curled up and kissed his cheek for as long as she could. "Your job is not insignificant. You are not useless. I will try to-to find ways to talk to you. I will be honest, I promise." She would find ways and she might be able to ask someone at work what they did if they had partners, she wasn't sure who did... she did not really talk to them about it. God, she was a bad person, wasn't she? She put her head on his shoulder, arms around his neck too, "and yet I am lucky to have you." She said softly because even if he felt useless and that his powers were not helping him, she was maybe lucky with those powers but she needed someone like him.

She kissed him softly on his lips after his apology. "That's okay, I am sorry I never knew it was that way." She felt a little quiet after that, she had wanted to say that bad but managed to change the word bad into way. She got up and extended her hand like an invitation. "Come, let's go for a walk. We can clean up this later, but let's clear our minds and maybe eat a little bit more after that." Considering both lost their appetites because of the conversation, it might help if they would go away from it for a bit and talk about something else.

She would get a light coat because it was quite breezy outside and she did not want to get sick if she still had a low immune system, with the loss of blood and the number of bruises, though most were healed now, she did not want to take a risk with it and she dragged him with her if he did not seem to be convinced. They could make a round around the block, with her speed that would take a bit. She wrapped her arms around his and clung to it, head against his shoulder as they walked, it wasn't the most comfortable her, but she was doing this for him and just as a general support. She was considering what to do to make it better but at this point, all that she could consider was open up a bit, but what would she be able to tell and what not? There were questions but the answers seemed to be up to her to decide and she was so scared of the consequences that it might take a bit, but she looked up to him and kissed him again in the middle of the street because who cared.