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Post by Deleted on Apr 5, 2020 18:36:28 GMT -4
Niji's new school year started tomorrow. She had not had a chance to relax and wind down since getting here. Most of the time it has been tours and meetings with other people. Jeeves called her to let her know that she would soon have a meeting with some financial advisers the next time she came to visit. She didn't want to discuss her father's will with a bunch of people that played no significance in her life. But she understood that it was important for her to keep her father's work alive and in order to do that she needed the money from it.
Still though, when was the last time she got to be a kid? It was almost as though she felt she was rushed into adulthood, no feeling of freedom from the pressure of being the last member of the Uta family. Maybe Jeeves was right. She needed to focus on her passions: building tech and making music. The latter was harder for her for quite some time. She was still embarrass for being caught singing in the front gate of school by some of the new students. So much for keeping that a secret. She didn't know if she was good enough to let her voice free again. Yes she hit the notes. She knew the words. But it felt like she was missing something.
She was outside the dorms in her usual clothing, consisting of a yellow short-sleeve shirt and a pair of yellow denim shorts. Her creamy hair was tied a up neatly by a giant rainbow hair bow that her father got her as Christmas gift. She completed her outfit with a pair of yellow sneaker with white shoestrings. She pulled her collar back to look down her shirt. The Rainbow Core that was affixed in her chest was working properly and shining brightly with different colors. She hadn't shown anyone this since she got here and was not sure how people would take it just yet.
Niji looked around the dorm grounds trying to find a quiet spot where no one could see or hear her. She found a nearby tree and sat underneath. The cooling shade did wonders for her skin against the low spring heat. She pulled out her phone and selected a track that she had been working on. She checked to make sure that no one was around and pressed play. She let the instrumentals take over before she began to sing.
She was lost in the song, remembering all the good times that she had with her friends. But they were gone now. She was a solo act now. This brought more tears to her eyes as she kept singing, not paying attention to anything around her.
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Post by Honey Hirano on Apr 14, 2020 4:28:06 GMT -4
Ara-ara what was that? Honey had been arriving on time this year for her second year at Yuuei and she had been half hanging out of the window. Where was her best friend? This year, she and Kumoko would share a room! It was amazing! Though it helped she accidentally had told her friend about the whole charade of stuff that Honey had to learn and that her mother did not have to sign a sheet about being okay about having a roommate so that worked wonders. She had gone up to miss Tsuchiya before the end of last year to ask if they could share a room and the woman had nothing against it. But now that she was waiting, she heard singing. That immediately sparked her interest, maybe oh no thanks. She doubted Aika would be allowed to come here and Seiki, well that would be fun!
She got up, well Kumoko wasn't here so Honey would just go and explore, she wasn't sure what side Kumoko wanted so she had not unpacked yet and she would rush down the stairs to see if she could find the person that was singing. Hm, it was nice, it could have maybe a bit more... volume? Honey wasn't sure what it was, she wasn't an expert anyway. She had been doing better for sure, the dance steps of most POPUP songs were in her mind now and the lyrics was doing great too. She could give a demonstration if that was allowed. Soon they would work on their new single!
She looked around the corner of the dorm building to see the person. Her sharp ears and eyes had an idea where to go next but the person still wasn't in sight. She tiptoed that way, climbing over the wall and to the tree, there she was sort of upside down. Legs higher than her head and looked down. Oooh another girl. She didn't know her, she had not seen her in the POPUP studio but she realized a little later, there were so many more people than just that. Heck, else she would never know about Lilith either.
When the song was done, she climbed a little later, "Hello!" She said with a smile, "Finally another singer around." Oops, no she had to be careful with what she said, even if Kumoko knew, there was still the rule of her mother; don't talk about singing at UA, don't talk about UA at POPUP.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 19, 2020 3:21:46 GMT -4
Niji closed out the song, finishing the lyrics with as much as she could put into it. It felt good to sing. She hadn't done much singing for quite sometime. Mostly because now her songs were filled with pain and regret. Who wanted to listen someone sing that had no soul in it? It was easy when they were with her. It was easy when her father was their to guide her. But now, she felt like she had no one to sing to. She was lonely for the first time in long while. Sure, she call up Jeeves and talk to him. But she didn't have the access to talk to him all the time like she did when she was at home. Maybe she would go to visit for the weekend...
Her thoughts were interrupted by another small voice. She looked up in the tree to see what appeared to be... a squirrel girl?... hanging upside down from the tree. She had huge smile on her face and her huge eyes was filled with curiosity and amazement. She felt like she had seen the girl somewhere... She couldn't quite put her finger on it. "Oh, me?" Niji asked trying to play dumb with a small smile on her face. "I was just messing around." Niji stood up and waved at the small girl. She had to be a student here. Maybe a first year she had not met. "My name is Niji Uta from Class 1-S. What's you name? Are you a student here?" She waited for the girl's response.
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Post by Honey Hirano on Apr 21, 2020 13:49:48 GMT -4
Being upside down, though her head in the horizontal part was still above her shoulders she looked at the person below her and said hello and talked about singing. Before she realized she should mentally bite her tongue and not speak out of line about some things she should not speak about. But that still did not mean she could not sing as a hobby, she knew Angel sang too or was it.. yea no it was Angel. "Yea, who else silly?" Honey said. Jumping off the tree and landing on her feet a little away and smiling as she got up and fixed her hair and outfit. So, she would be fine. Now, where was she, oh right, the girl said she was just messing around and Honey just nodded. "Nice to meet you, I am Honey Hirano from class 2-S." She said enthusiastically. Yes, she had passed the year with her tutors and everything and she was rather proud of that.
Now she could start the year properly, no tutors and only her acting tasks and her performances for POPUP. She would have to work on that solo performance and work on the small concert that they would give this summer. How the heck will she keep her two identities separated was a miracle idea for her but she would see, thank god she wasn't in charge of such difficult questions. She beamed brightly, "Singing is my passion." She decided to say to keep the conversation going, she wasn't sure where to begin or what to say. Honey had, as was usual, jumped into a situation without thinking about it. Hopefully, this was something she was going to learn about when she would get on her internships because it was definitely a bit silly to do way too much and way too much without thinking was simply; stupid.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 26, 2020 2:39:08 GMT -4
The squirrel girl had give her name- Honey Hirano. Wow, that's a lovely name. Niji felt like she heard from somewhere, but she couldn't put her finger on it. She let the thought pass her mind as Honey spoke with such a smile and so much energy. Niji use to have that same energy. That same smile. But it had been some time since she felt that way. When she was around people, of course she would put on joyful, cheerful face. She didn't want others to be sad around her. But when it's her alone or with her butler, the weight of the world fell on her shoulders.
"I use to love to sing," Niji said looking at the ground. There was a bit of sadness in her voice. "I use to sing with my friends all the time. I just... don't have the time to anymore." Lie. She knew she was lying. The real reason she couldn't sing was deeper than that. Even when she sang happier songs, she could feel sadness in it. The pain of losing so much was just to much for her. Plus, now with her father gone, she had to fill in his role. The Uta legacy of science. Protecting his fortune. Changing the world's views. There was no more time for singing. To her, there was no room in her life for that anymore. She didn't have her friends to sing with her anymore. Her father wasn't their to cheer her on. It was just her.
Niji looked attempting to put a brave smile. "I bet you are wonderful at singing though. You sound like you have the voice for it."
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Post by Honey Hirano on May 6, 2020 5:20:00 GMT -4
Her ears dripped a little down when Niji said she loved to sing. But why sing still if you don't like it anymore? She was sure there was a secret message that Honey tried to decode. "But hm." Oh so it had to do with her friends, who she would probably see less now that she was here, she nodded again. Honey was absolutely oblivious to the fact that Niji was lying. "Well, if you need a new singing partner, I can try." But there was this nagging little voice in the back of her head that told her that she wasn't allowed to sing on campus. But who cares! If it made someone happier and bring back their love for singing then so be it!
She blushed a little when Niji complimented her and she brushed the back of her head, "Hehe, you are too kind." Though she better be singing alright, wonderful would be even better but you could not demand such thing, but seriously all the harsh singing classes from last year and this year that wouldn't even end. She almost opened her mouth to tell Niji more but she knew how to swallow it just in time. "Have you ever been to a concert?" The squirrel had not, being able to create one was something that was thus far more exciting because of both facts. But now, it wasn't about her and she would try to learn more from Niji.
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Post by Deleted on May 16, 2020 1:25:37 GMT -4
Niji smiled a little. A singing partner. That sounded nice when she thought about it. But what was the use? She just didn't feel the soul of the music like she used to. Of course, at the age of nine, she would not have realized it back then. But now, she felt like an empty shell that was just pretending to be happy. There were days where she enjoyed being around people, mostly for private meetings and such. But then there were days when she realized that those "people" were not the people she lost. It was hard to explain even now. "I would love to sing with you... one day," Niji holding with a small smile. She wasn't sure if she was lying or telling the truth at this point. Her real focus was following her father's footsteps in the pursuit of science. To build the dream company he would never get the chance to. But there were days she longed for the stage. The smiles of the crowd. The joy to perform from the heart in front of thousands. Even Jeeves encouraged her to try again in the spotlight, stating that she could have both hers and her father's dreams. But she felt like she couldn't. She was forgotten. Her friends were forgotten. And that was the reality of it. She had commented that Honey had a wonderful voice that was perfect for singing. She thought that would be the end of it until Honey asked her about ever being at a concert. "Once," Niji answered. "It was... fun. I went with my dad when I was little. He... has a lot of work nowadays." She hated lying to people. She was part of the concert. She was at the concert as the performer. One of the performers. But those days were gone now, just like her father and friends, and she had to accept it. "What about you?" she asked with a smile. "Have you ever been to a concert, Honey?"
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Post by Honey Hirano on May 26, 2020 11:06:11 GMT -4
Honey nodded, well it was a start if people said one day right? She had so much to work on and do but with the new year starting at least, the tutors were gone. "You should meet my friends from eh eh singing class." She almost spilt out POPUP but managed to just not say it on time. She was doing fine. She was not going to tell anyone but Kumoko about it and Lilith, she was doing good. Soon no one will notice that she was gone and filming and... think about something else before you spill too much! Honey knew that she was a blabbermouth and that she would easily say something that was on her mind without thinking. She was doing her very best to change that. But Honey was too oblivious to catch too much of Niji's mindset, because well she got complimented, was flustered and wanted to ask more about just meeting Niji. It wasn't every day you met another singing person! "Oh I know that feel, I have never been to a concert, always wondered what it be like, but I am also very small so I probably need one with seats, else I don't see anything." She laughed a little. Strange she had never gone to the concerts with her mother, her father probably didn't like them. "So jealous, I assume the atmosphere must be great and all. I-I am going to one probably in August, the date wasn't very clear but it's from the new generation of a- of a band that I like." Shut up, shut up, shut up, danger! Honey had hit the line again, if she would comment more it would be horrible and well it would also be worse if she now learned Niji was going too. How small were the chances though if she had only gone to one concert before. Relax... or something.
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Post by Deleted on May 28, 2020 1:48:31 GMT -4
The young squirrel girl's name continued to pick at the back of her brain. Niji felt like she heard from somewhere, but she couldn't put her finger on it. Maybe she had seen Honey from somewhere... No that couldn't be it. Heard her voice? She hasn't listened to music too much these days. She decided to put the thought away for now. It just was nice to have a company. When was the last time she actually talked to someone? About... anything?
"I'm not really sure if I would have the time," said Niji, looking at the ground. "I have so much going on right now, I don't think." She wanted to say she was scared. She wanted to say that she was chasing her father's dream of building a company. She wanted to talk about how the benefactors would pull her father's funding and wealth if she failed to prove herself to them. But this wasn't Honey's problem. It was hers. And she didn't want to drag her into it.
"I know you will enjoy it," Niji answered the girl about her first concert. She looked at her with a smile "It's fun and exciting and... you get to share it with people you really care about." She said the last part, feeling a little sad but was still smiling. Niji didn't want to show her emotions to Honey. But Honey was chipping away little by little. How long had she been holding in?
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Post by Honey Hirano on Jun 1, 2020 4:14:21 GMT -4
She nodded, Honey did not see this as an excuse because last year she was so busy as well, it was highly possible new years had that as well. "Well, if you have anything with school later on, that you don't get or want to discuss, I am now a second year, so if I can help you with that when classes start, just come find me." She would be on campus much more now that she had no more tutors on Monday till Wednesday, it was a happy thing to consider if you asked the little squirrel. She wasn't also sure if Seiki and Aika were okay with her just random taking someone to singing class but well it had been just something she had not thought about before saying it. This was just the way Honey worked, and it was definitely something to work on.
So then Honey decided to ask Niji about concerts as she had never been and had not really asked Elise-senpai enough about it. It wasn't all too smart but they were at this point now. "Good!" She said with a grin as Niji said she would enjoy it, that was the most important part right? She nodded, she wasn't sure if she cared that much yet about her new friends but on the other hand it would be a new fun adventure so probably. She tilted her head a little, she had not missed Niji struggling to say who you would share it with and she frowned a little. However then again even if she was oblivious from time to time, she wasn't someone who would push for answers. She could ask it differently, not entirely by the subject but just make it an open question, "Are you okay?" She looked a little worried, cooled down a little in her overenthusiastic act. Now it was up to Niji to talk to her or not, if she did Honey would try to see what she could do and if she did not, well that was up to Niji of course, simple they just met, Honey would not think worse of her.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 1, 2020 15:45:13 GMT -4
Honey's worried eyes met Niji's sad ones. How do you tell someone that you barely know that your life is in shambles? It was tough to do. But then she thought back to what Jeeves had told her when she received the acceptance letter to UA. How she should let some memories go and try to make new ones. How she should try to let others in instead of shutting them out or finding an excuse not to try. But trust was so hard to give. Yet here was someone who was trying to listen. Maybe holding everything inside wasn't the best course of action. Maybe the best way to help herself is to talk.
Niji took a deep breath and looked at Honey with a somber look. She couldn't wear her mask of happiness forever. "To be honest, no," Niji replied to Honey's question. "I thought when I came to UA, everything would clear up and I would be happy. But the truth is I feel the same as I did before I got here." She looked up to the sky as the day finally became night, the stars shining brightly in the sky. "The truth is I miss my friends and my dad. I miss having someone to talk to about... well, just life in general."
She pulled out her phone and showed it to Honey. On it was a picture of her when she was nine with eight friends of the same age, each with different hair colors and outfits. Her father standing behind her, beaming proudly at their first successful concert. "These were my friends," Niji said with a soft smile. "Behind us is my dad. They were all like family to me." Her smile became sad expression. "But norm, I can't talk to them anymore."
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Post by Honey Hirano on Jun 12, 2020 9:25:14 GMT -4
On the one hand, Niji her honest answer surprised Honey for the same reason as why Niji had not opened up immediately. They barely knew each other, now Honey didn't find it bad Niji shared with her, but she was scared she might say something stupid. But no, this was what she wanted to learn and she was going to do fine. She almost opened her mouth though to respond that Niji could still go visit everyone even though there were dorms here but she was glad that she realized that be stupid, and she should wait for the first year student to finish talking. That would be after all, more polite and who knew what more she would say. Honey her patience and speed had therefore made her gasp for air. Her idea to answer that they could still meet up and call did not help when the girl said she could not talk to them anymore. Honey wasn't entirely stupid, she could be dense though but the fact that she had the girls as a background and a picture with her father made it clear they weren't around anymore, hence the no talking and now that she thought about it longer, Niji had used the past tense.
"I think, and I barely know you but it sounds like it, that you are very hard on yourself." She put her hands on her hips, "Niji-san, you can't be immediately happy because you crossed the school's main gate. It will always take time and you must not think that missing your friends or your dad is a bad thing, they will always be with you and it's not bad to make new friends, they will never replace your other friends after all." She said very softly and calm, which was kind of the opposite of her normal behaviour but Honey was really doing her best to be nice and good about this and making feel Niji at ease. "The school year just started, so you will be in lot more classes and adventures, just let it come to you and see what happens." She smiled a little at Niji, hoping she was doing good. It didn't need to be immediately accepted but maybe it brought Niji some thoughts on what she could do or how to tackle the issue. It was definitely not bad to grief, it did not matter how long it would take, but it was good to try and be a little less hard on yourself.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 14, 2020 4:01:45 GMT -4
Niji could tell this was a second-year who has been through a lot. Her wise words invaded her mind and heart as the keys that were opening doors that were close for a long time. Niji understood what Honey was saying and she knew that she was trying to help. But somewhere in her heart, she felt this tug on her heart that was wanting her to run away from it all. To not accept that Honey's words were true.
"I know you are right about that," Niji responded, "but... I don't know." Niji looked at the starry sky. She saw a shooting star whizzing by. "People always say that if you wish for the things you want then it will come true." Niji had a small tear come out of her eye as it gently rolled down her cheeks. "When I lost my friends and my dad, I wished to be strong. I wished to protect everyone." Niji looked back down at the ground as tears started to fall little by little. "But wishes don't come true!" she sobbed. "If they did, my dad would still be alive! My friends would have been safe! I wouldn't have to... feel like it's my fault."
All the baggage that Niji had carried for all those years had finally released itself. Honey's kindness had finally chipped away at the mask that Niji wore every day in front of people. That mask that said everything was okay. That she had moved on. The mask she used for her butler, Jeeves, when he asked if she was okay. The mask that she hid behind when the benefactors asked her what her plans for her father's wealth. The mask she wore every time she would look at the concert poster of her friends announcing their performance. She couldn't wear the mask anymore. And it was falling, piece by piece.
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Post by Honey Hirano on Jun 16, 2020 10:24:08 GMT -4
Just studying and paying attention to what she wanted to do in her future, being supportive and being there for people seemed to have shown some effect. She seemed to know a little bit of what to say and she was trying to look as positive towards the future horizon at this moment. She looked up as well when Niji did, and she bit her lip, no one ever told her about the wishing star. She knew the concept, but her mother and father had always said working hard would bring it. She had always had to do so and she was sure that Niji in probably another matter had to work in the same way. She did not know what happened to Niji her friends or her father but that wasn't the question Honey would give. She watched the girl sob and she felt it tug on her own heart, it wasn't always fair in life, that was something Honey did know.
"Niji," She said softly, putting her hand on the first-years shoulder. "A wishing star is a very beautiful concept but it is a harsh one, and not fair, what you have been through has not been fair but not your fault. You are here at Yuuei now, Yuuei will teach you how to be stronger and how to protect people if you want that. But that is the future and you have such a long future for you, don't give up." She wanted to say that she should do so to try for her father, for her friends, but that was going too far if Honey did not know what happened, so she decided not to say that. She just looked at her with a frown on her face, she was worried. She did not know yet how to do this, definitely something to note down for her internship questions.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 18, 2020 2:02:24 GMT -4
Niji listened again to the wise words of Honey. She heard this before. From her friend, Midori. A friend that was long gone with the others. What once was a rainbow was now a gray cloudy sky filled with rain and thunder. That was how she felt with her life. "I feel so much pressure though," Nji said, wiping away the tears from her eyes. "Everyone expects me to do something different. I feel like I have to be what everyone wants me to be. I feel like I have to be what people want to see me as."
Niji picked at the grass, pulling out a small thing piece. Her thoughts drifting back when Jeeves would always teach her difference of what people wanted and what she wanted. "But at times I don't want to be that. I want to build support tech for those who need it. I want to make my own company and continue what my father work so hard for. I want to be able..." She stopped in her sentence for a second as a small breeze blew away the small blade of grass she held. It was though it was escaping into the night sky, free of worry from its next destination. That's how she wished she could feel.
"I want to be able to sing again. I want to sing and not feel so guilty about it. I want people to feel joy like..." She wanted to say 'like they use to when I was with my friends', but the words wouldn't come out as though it was stuck deep down in her soul. "When I look at my future, all I see is nothing," Niji continued sadly looking at Honey. "And I feel like I am no closer to seeing it. I feel like if I don't see it, then I will fail." A protector. A performer. A business owner. A hero. Those were the things she wanted. But she felt like there was no way she could get there. She felt lost.
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